I have been working on healing myself. I am no longer in a relationship of any kind. I feel fulfilled and happy to be on my own for the first time in my life. My breakup with my last girlfriend was tough, but I learned a lot about myself. Rather than ask myself (when I make mistakes) what was I thinking? I am learning to ask myself, What was I learning? I can definitely say I have been learning a lot.
I have learned to ignore people who don't like or understand the fact that I am bisexual. Nothing is going to change that. I really don't think I would change myself, even if I could. I like being this way. It is difficult when my parents don't acknowledge the fact that I am, or when they think I am choosing to be this way, or when other people judge me and think I am just unable to make up my mind. But honestly, I like myself! I still feel pain every day when I think about my parents and the way they disapprove of me. No matter how old I get, I still want my parents to love me and to be proud of me. I am pretty sure they love me, but I wonder if they will ever accept me as I am and be proud of the person that I am.
Yes, I am still an atheist. I always will be. Until I see some real evidence that there is a god, which every day convinces me more and more that there isn't, then I will stick with logic and just say we have this one life, so I am going to do everything I can to make it great. I feel less angry about the way I was raised. I can see my parents were just doing the best they could. I can see they turned to religion as a way to cope with life. I understand that. I am trying to learn to judge them less and to understand things from their perspective. They are really good grandparents to my kids and I appreciate that they spend time with Noah almost every week and that they drive him to Boyscouts. He enjoys spending time with them too.
|Noah and me on his birthday: November 1st|
Things I want to continue to work on:
1) Being more accepting of people who have different beliefs than I do.
2) Trying to see things from the perspective of others.
3) Forgiving people who have hurt me.
4) Letting things go. Sometimes I am just too sensitive and I get my feelings hurt very easily.
5) Being the best and most moral person that I can be so that I can show others that imaginary beings are not what makes us good people. WE are what makes us good people. WE have it all inside of us.
|Who would have known there were abs under there?|
Thanks to those who read my blog! I appreciate it!
A special and BIG thanks to Vyckie Garrison for all the mentions on Twitter. Check out her awesome blog here: